28 Times Eric Cartman Said Exactly The Right Thing

is easilyĀ the greatestĀ South ParkĀ character of all timeĀ and arguably the greatest animated TV character. Fat, exploitative, and a total dick, Cartman’s inflatedĀ sense of self-importance bestows him a lack of self-awareness terrible for the real world but excellent for comedy. Eric may only be eight-years-old, but he’s got a lifetime’s worth of gripes, evidenced by this gallery of the greatest CartmanĀ South ParkĀ quotes.

If you’re struggling for answers in life, CartmanĀ quotes will solve your problems, albeit with advice that would only serve someone as depraved as he is. In this tribute to Eric Theodore Cartman’s greatest quotes, you’ll witness many of theĀ lessons South Park hasĀ taught us. Respect his autoritah!

A Classic

Respect The Cartman

Food For Thought

Eric Cartman’s #1 Life Goal

Sex Ed With Cartman

Eight Is Not Enough

Quality Over Quantity

Anger Management

Christian Bail Out

Generation Penetration

Cartman On Hippies

The Physics Of Fun

Roll with the Punches

Magic Carpet Ride

Love Stinks

No Pie For You!

Sure Thing

Cartman On Girl Fights

Get A Grip

Fat Chance

No Butts About It

No Family Ties

Sell Yourself Short

Meat The Parents

Growing Pains

Vagina Monologue

Bedtime Stories With Cartman

A Touching Tale