Is there anything more delightful than waking up on a Saturday morning, looking at your phone, and thinking “wow, look at all these drunk texts I sent last night!” Though there are likely a few regrettable texts sent to your ex, mixed in with the horror are likely all kinds of funny drunk texts for which your friends will forever thank you (and never let you live down). The best of these have been archived forever throughout the Internet, as these screenshots of drunk texts from last night show. The best drunk texts and funny drunk text messages are full of autocorrects, typos, interesting emoji choices, and all around hilarity ranging from kittens to dance moves, to Flo Rida. There is also no shortage of people who tie one on and spill their guts. Some profess their undying love, while others just need to know there’s someone out there who cares, and will hopefully pick them up as they aren’t really sure how to get home right now.
Ready to Party, but Nowhere to Go
Dragons LOVE Goose Water
Okay, but What if He Really Was the Batman?
Jason Bourne Stars in The Drunk Identity
When Fanboys Drink
Mom Always Makes Confessions After Some Chardinay
Can’t See the Forest for the Alcohol
Kitten Is a Great Code Name for Beer Actually
Is “Too Funk” Really a Problem?
It’s Like Drinking in a Bad ’80s Movie
Here’s Hoping We All Find the Sweetest Candything in Our Lives
Now That’s Commitment!
The Morning After Makes You Do Strange Things
Birds of a Feather Drunk Text Together
Face it, Young Slut, Your Mom Is Cooler Than You
A God Among Drunks
When Your Legs Feel Good, YOU Feel Good
Don’t We All?
Truth or Drunk?
You Sober? Beause I’m Flies!
Bit the Nail… Outside the Bun
I Shall Sing You the Song of My Loins
Who Doesn’t Want to Come Back as a Dolphin?
“Nah Scrot Ja” Is Definitely German
What DOES This Person Malean?
Are You Trying to Tell Us You Want Oysters?
Oh, it Will Probably Come to Concussions Eventually
Is Ditcion The Next Big Thing in the Bitcoin World?
Captured on Camera for Posterity
Totes Goaded Mirite?
“I Miss You” Is a Great Joke Apparently
The Truth About Pocahontas Finally Comes Out
An Urgent Message for Janey/James
Spirits of Argon Must Be the Coolest New Cocktail
We Should All Have as Much Fum as This Mom
Can DJs Ever Handle Drunk Moms, Though?
Isn’t Riven River a Location in Game of Thrones?