31 Unfortunate Fortune Cookie FAILs

Fortune cookies are always a gamble. It’s like what Forrest Gump said about that box of chocolates, fortune cookies are basically life. So when people are opening a fortune cookie, they’re basically experiencing life. But the funniest and greatest fortune cookie come from either accidental Engrish (false, Asian-inspired, incorrect English), typos, or people trying to pull of that just don’t work. 

So here, all in one place, are the worst fortune cookies (or the best fortune cookie fortunes, if you like hilariously terrible ones) of all time. 

These are the funniest fortune cookie fails, or fortune cookie fortunes, that the has to offer. Upvote the best fortune cookies and downvote the ones you think are either Photoshopped (though I tried to avoid that completely) or lame. 

Do the BEAR Bones Minimum

They Know…

Flying Is NOT Simple

The Morpheus Cookie


They’re Not Literally Time Travelers, You Know


Cookie Cruelty

The Scary Part Is That I Always Eat Two

The Cookie’s Death Note

That’s Not How Clocks Work…

I Think This Depends on The Muppet

I Can Relate to This, Having Been Trapped in a Well

A Fortune Rick Roll

You Can Take That to the BANK

This -Ending Fortune

My Favorite Time

Fighting A ‘That’s What She Said’ SO Hard

Hahaha They Have NO Idea

Oh Waiters and Their Meaningless Lives!

It’s Like They Thought They Were Just Thrown in There


You’re Shaped Weird

Whatever It Is, It’s Easy. Just Do It!

Is Space Limit Really the Problem Here?

For When on Fifth Dates

Staying Away from 4Chan

Yeah Stop Making Bugs You Guys

Might As Well Say You Will Read This Fortune’

Money Isn’t Infinite, Bro

Don’t Even TRY Today