Check Your Balls
I read a magazine article in the doctor’s office today that said, “The finger holes in bowling balls have been found to contain substantial amounts of fecal contamination.” Can you imagine someone taking a crap in those tiny little holes? Sperm I could understand, but crap???
I really enjoy watching Betty White.She’s old and filthy… just like my bowling ball.
Strike This From The Records?
Studies indicate that 4 out of every 10 professional bowlers
wind up in the gutter.
A League Of My Own
I go down on one knee. Start praying and wind up in the gutter, I call it Tebowling.
Random Thoughts 33
Never rent bowling shoes,if you wear size 15.
I used to dream of being a professional bowler, but then a sports injury – spare ribs – stopped me.
The 4 ups in Bowls
Skips must be up. Thirds must measure up. Seconds must chalk up. Leads must shut up.
What do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
Chances are they’ll both end up in the gutter.
100 Year Old Bowler
A 100-year-old woman from New Jersey has become the oldest competitor in the history of the United States Bowling Congress Women’s Championships. Because bowling is totally a real sport.
Press Option 1
I walked into a bowling alley and saw a one-armed man. I asked myself,”I wonder if he’s a lefty or a righty”?I’m a total dumbass.
Possession of Wii
Some Florida police are in trouble for being caught on camera playing Wii Bowling during a drug raid. Nerds!
Antonio Pierce Out
New York Giants linebacker Antonio Pierce is out indefinitely with a strained neck. The former Pro Bowler injured himself looking up at the standings.
Consult to your doctor
The doc said I have tennis elbow and I thought I was playing bowls!
Bowler is Perfect, Then Dies
A Michigan man died of a heart attack moments after bowling the first perfect game of his life. To add insult to injury, the lane made his estate pay for the shoes.
Did anyone hear about the young woman who had sex at the bowling lanes with a ten pin? nine months later, she gave birth to a healthy 16 pound bowling ball.
Thunder isn’t angel’s bowling
Thunder sounds more like angel’s taking a dump rather then bowling.
Giants Go Bowling
Giants coach Tom Coughlin surprised his team by canceling their classroom work and taking them bowling. Probably preparing them for a season in the gutter.
Strike While The Iron Is Hot
Professional bowlers have their name on the back of their shirt.Tiger Woods has his cell number.
Tiger Woods could always change sports,like Michael Jordan did.He should become a professional bowler,keeping his balls in the gutter.
I worked in a bowling alley,until the stuff I sprayed in rental shoes starting giving me splitting headaches.
Gas Station declared Historic Place
A Bowling Green, Kentucky filling station built in 1921 has been placed on the National Register of Historic Places. It marks the only time a gas station restroom was cleaned.
Custer’s Second Arrow
I was watching professional bowling, and this guy from Finland beat the other pro,299-100.I haven’t seen a slaughter that bad, since Custer’s Last Stand.
In my dream I had a trophy wife, golden and perfect…but then things shifted to nightmare alley, and I saw that she was stuck on a wood block and swinging a bowling ball, right between my freaking eyes. Welcome to my world.
Blank Check Up
I like that tv commercial where the lady in the bowling alley has Alzheimer’s.WARNING:People in bowling alleys with Alzheimer’s may wind up in the gutter!