Silly WikiHow Articles You Won’t Believe Really Exist

One of the many sad truths of existence is that everyone can’t be an expert at everything, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t learn about as many things as possible. wikiHow is a great way to learn how to do something new, but the dumb wikiHow articles collected on this list have helped no one learn how to do anything. (Unless someone actually snuck their cat into work, that article’s actually pretty detailed.) Take a look at these wikiHow articles that you won’t believe really exist.

It doesn’t matter who wrote these weird wikiHow pages, they’re amazing in the same way that a car crash, or taquitos from 7-11 are amazing. A lot of these articles are for things that you don’t need someone to tell you how to do, like tying your shoes or making ice. But some of the entries on this list of wikiHow articles are 100% bonkers. If you’re looking up how to pretend to be possessed or how to appreciate death metal, you might need more than a wikiHow page to help you in your quest. For starters, you maybe a therapist, or even just a friend. Keep reading to check out some of the weirdest wikiHow articles that you need to put in your life right now.

How to Become a Ghost
An alternate title for this list was, “How to waste 10 minutes.”
How to Trick People Into Thinking You're Possessed
Oh no, it looks like whoever wrote this got their information mixed up with the page for “How to Make Everyone Think You’re an Assh*le.”
How to Act Like a Modern/Common Vampire
The only pertinent information in this ridiculous/amazing how-to is ” Act sympathetic to people’s problems. Remember, after living for 1,000 years you have experienced every problem on Earth!” That’s just good advice.
How to Listen to Music
The fact that this wikiHow page doesn’t just say “With your ears!” is a shamefully missed opportunity.
How to Walk
Oh boy, if you’re consulting the Internet on how to walk then you have to turn in your license to be an adult, go back to your mom’s house, and start over as a baby. Those are the rules.
How to High Five
The only reason you need this page to exist is if you’re trying to convince the government that you’re not from Mars.
How to Apologize to a Cat
As anyone who has ever lived with a cat knows, no matter how often you apologize, you’ll never be forgiven.
How to Read a Book
If you didn’t learn how to do this in kindergarten, you’re not going to learn from an article on wikiHow.
How to Make Ice Cubes with an Ice Tray
Let’s all save some time: put water in a container, put it in the freezer, be patient. You’re welcome.
How to Charge Your Phone
The thing about modern phones is that they’re so easy to use even children have them. If you have to ask how to charge a phone, you don’t deserve to own one.
How to Sneak Your Cat Into Work
Sneaking your cat into work is a lot like robbing a bank: If you have to ask how to do it, you’re probably going to get caught.
How to Make Toast
Who knew that making toast was so hard? What’s that? It’s not? It’s the easiest thing in the world you say? Well now how do you know who to trust. 
How to Appreciate Death Metal
Nice try wikiHow, but everyone knows that no one one will ever appreciate death metal because it lacks the purity of black metal.
How to Make a Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich
Knowing how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich should be inherent knowledge planted in your brain before birth, but for some reason more than half a million people have had to look up this recipe.
How to Check Email by Using Google Mail
It’s hard to not have a sneaking suspicion that this article was written specifically for your grandma because you won’t return her calls.
How to Know If You Are Drunk
Look, if you’ve been drunk then you know how to tell if you’re drunk. Unless you get to that point where you’re so drunk that you think you’re just being awesome. Unfortunately then you won’t be able to see straight, so trying to read anything on any website will be pointless.
How to Decide What to Podcast About
There are already way too many podcasts. If you’re not sure what to podcast about it means that you shouldn’t be podcasting. Why not just go yell at a lake?
How to Talk Your Mom Into Saying Yes
Is this a how-to written for sociopaths? Have you ever been more afraid of other humans than you are right now?
How to Tie Your Shoes
Tying your shoes can be difficult – if you’re a two year old. But for anyone with the ability to go to wikiHow to learn how to complete the sisyphean task of tying two strings together, you shouldn’t have to ask.