The Most Disgusting Canned Foods

The most disgusting canned foods make Spam look like a well-aged filet mignon. These weird canned foods make fast look like fine dining. These strange canned foods make Spaghetti-Os look like $100/plate Italian cuisine. From the weird meats to bugs to strange combinations, these canned foods contain things that most people wouldn’t eat fresh, let alone after they’ve been sitting in an aluminum can for who knows how long on some dusty shelf. Worst canned foods ever.

Everyone loves convenience but there’s only so much quality that can be preserved when companies start canning foods like BBQ chicken sandwiches, peanut butter and jelly, cheeseburgers and hot dogs. Then again, hot dogs even fresh are not the definition of fine food to begin with.

For many of these canned foods, the dish is considered a delicacy in one part of the world or another. Haggis is wildly popular in Scotland. Duck fat is big in France. Silkworm pupae is sold on the streets in Korea. None of the above are considered close to normal in these parts and we would probably never seen them in cans in the US. Then again, the people who enjoy those weird foods probably frown on the canned buzzard gizzards and canned creamed possum, two foods that also make this list.

What are the most disgusting canned food in the world? Other foods on this list are just weird. Canned huitlacoche is something along the lines of hibernating excrement fungi that grows on corn. Canned birds nest drink is made from actual birds nests. Canned Russian herring is literally a can of fish mouths, complete with big, scary teeth. Whoever decided these things are edible needs to get their head examined.

All of these foods are way worse than the gross foods that other cultures actually love. These strange canned foods are as suspect as recipes that use bodily fluids. These disgusting canned foods are the ones that would stay on the shelves after a catastrophic event when we’re all starving. These weird canned foods are just wrong. Yuck!

Canned Cheeseburger

Why pay only a buck for a fresh fast food cheeseburger when you can pay $6 for a canned cheeseburger? That’s the question posted by the Katadyn Group, the Swiss company that produces the cheeseburger in a can. Somehow fast food mystery meat seems delicious in comparison.

Canned Creamed Possum

For the unfamiliar, a possum is nothing more than a really big rat. Creaming possum and putting it in a can with sweet potato and “coon fat gravy” does not make it any less inedible. Please tell me people don’t actually call this food.

Canned Fish Assholes

If you’re not into canned fish mouths from Russia, perhaps you’re more of a canned fish assholes kind of person. We don’t even want to think about where the asshole is on a fish or what it tastes like let alone why this strange canned food is popular enough to come in Manhattan and Wisconsin style.

Canned Pork Brains

Now we all love canned pork brains, but canned pork brains in milk gravy? That’s just obscene. Wait, canned pork brains in any kind of gravy or none at all is pretty gross.

Canned Russian Herring

You never hear people say, “hey, let’s go eat Russian food,” and the fact that canned Russian herring exists is one reason why. These fish mouths, with sharp teeth and all, are no joke. File this under things we wouldn’t eat regardless of whether they came out of a can or not.

Canned Haggis

Haggis is made from taking the organs of a sheep, like the heart, liver and lungs, and mixing it with onion, oatmeal and spices, then stuffing it into the stomach of a sheep and cooking it. Canned haggis is all of the above stuffed into a can where it sits for who knows how long before a brave soul, readdrunk people of Scotland, eats it. *Shudders*

Canned Silkworm Pupae

Remember when people freaked out when “Fear Factor” had contestants eat bugs? This is about 100 times worse. Silkworm pupae, the little creepy bugs sold on the street in Korea, is canned in a gooey substance. There is not enough money in the world that could make us eat this, not even BBQ flavored.

Canned Armadillo

Nothing says disgusting like turnpike quality creamed armadillo on the half shell. Seriously, the image on the can looks like someone scooped up roadkill, couldn’t sell it to dog food manufacturers so is now selling it on its own. Please let this be some weird redneck joke.

Canned Tongues

There’s a reason lamb tongues are canned. It’s because eating animal tongues is disgusting, hence the excess and the need to stuff these suckers into cans for eternity. No amount of garnish or serving suggestion can make canned lamb tongues any less gross.

Canned Scorpions

Much like the band of the same name, scorpions are likely to “Rock You Like a Hurricane” since their venom is highly poisonous. Luckily, canned roasted scorpions are cooked and therefore safe to eat, plus they come in a smokey BBQ flavor.

Canned Bird’s Nest Drink

In some parts of the world, bird’s nest soup is considered a delicacy despite being made from the spit and nests created by cave swifts. The nests are dissolved and made into soup. Yeah, it’s disgusting, but not as disgusting as taking that recipe and making it into a canned energy drink.

Canned Buzzard Gizzards

Buzzard gizzards sounds like a fabulous thing to play on a triple word score in Scrabble but not like anything that should be eaten. Come to think of it, no part of a buzzard, let alone a gizzard, sounds appetizing, either fresh or canned.

Canned Reindeer

Because learning that Santa Claus isn’t real is not traumatic enough for one lifetime, now you can eat Donner, Dasher, and of course Rudolph in canned reindeer. Described as “an indulgent Christmas treat,” the Arctic delicacy will set you back around $30 for a tiny little can.

Canned Huitlacoche

Canned huitlacoche sounds disgusting, but is a Mexican specialty that translates to “corn smut.” Corn smut sounds disgusting too but it’s really only the fungus that grows on corn, which isn’t disgusting at all. The food is also called cuitacoche, which literally translates to hibernating excrement.

Canned Sandwiches

Available in peanut butter and jelly in strawberry and grape varieties, as well as BBQ chicken, the Candwich is a ready to eat sandwich in a can. As a bonus, there’s also a candy surprise in each can. Here we thought a sandwich in a can was a scary enough surprise on its own.

Canned All Day Breakfast

“Baked beans with sausages, mini ‘Scotch’ eggs, mushrooms and bacon in a tasty tomato sauce” is the claim on the label for this disgusting canned food. Is the can supposed to last all day or is that the length of the time the indigestion will last after consuming this food?

Canned Hot Dogs

It’s a well-known fact that hot dogs are suspect to begin with, especially with horror stories of the weird parts of the pig that are used to create fresh hot dogs. Take that uncertainty and make it worse by putting five giant hot dogs in a can. We can only assume that the can contains just the wieners, not the buns, mustard and all the fixings. Regardless, we’ll pass.

Canned Duck Fat

Many people meticulously trim their meat before cooking it and simply discard the fat. Somewhere, someone had a brilliant idea to can that fat and sell it for $60 for a tiny can, like with canned duck fat.They do say that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

Canned Brown Bread

Though it may be the sworn enemy of low-carb eaters, fresh baked bread is something amazing. Brown bread in a can… not so much. This gelatinous slab of brown bread is 99% fat free and 100% disgusting.

Canned Grass Jelly Drink

There is really nothing redeeming about canned grass jelly drink. Stalks and leaves of a plant similar tomint are steamed with starch, then cooled and this jelly forms. The jelly itself, which tastes like iodine lavender, can be eaten or the bizarre gel can be made into a drink. Yuck!

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