The Top 7 Police Officers Caught Having Sex

Police Officers are supposed to protect and serve while on duty, but these cops were all about getting booty (I’m so sorry for that joke, but you deserved it. You. Deserved. It). These seven police officers were busted having police sex (the greatest kind of sex), while on duty, and some of them on company property. Here are the top seven cops caught having sex on duty stories that made the news in recent memory, because there’s nothing more gratifying than when cops make mistakes. Especially sexy ones. (Police sex videos and links to the cop sex videos included when available).

Police Officer Caught Having Sex On The Hood Of His Car

Talk about a strip search, this cop went for the full body cavity search on this motorist. A surveillance photo shows a cop in full uniform giving it to a girl on the hood of his car. The best part, you can clearly see a stray dog watching the whole thing go down. That’s right, there was a witness.

After the story became a national senstation the New Mexico police department launched an investigation on why exactly some chick would want to get slammed on top of a cop car (upcoming investigations include other common sense givens such as why there’s so much porn on the internet).

It appears the police officer in question had not been on patrol for weeks, which would explain why it’s not a patrol car that he’s having sex on but a simple state sedan. The Santa Fe sheriff Robert Garcia said he would not press criminal charges because the incident occurred “in the middle of nowhere” where there are apparently no rules in New Mexico. Take note, drug lords!

The officer was awarded police officer of the year in the past and had previously served on former governor Bill Richardson’s security detail. And now you can insert a joke here about how he was providing that fine young lady with his very own brand of “security detail”. Thank you for doing that for me, we spend a lot of time on this around here. Moving on…


24 Year Veteran Of The Police Force Loses Job After Being Caught Having Sex

Officer Scott Guffey was a 24 year veteran of the Tampa Police Department, but he lost his job when he put chasing tail ahead of chasing criminals. When he was confronted with an internal affairs investigation Guffey chose to instantly retire.

It all started when an anonymous person called the police to report an undercover cop going at it in his police car at a park. This caller had been watching this happen for several days and told the police that he watched as Guffey had sex and then returned the next day with the same woman to do it again. The person said they saw Guffey take off his bullet proof vest and gun belt then slip into the back seat of his unmarked car.

Guffey is married but the woman in the backseat was not his wife. His record also showed several citations from IA for missing court and one citation for “misuse of company email.”


Two Officers Have Sex Instead Of Guarding A Prisoner

These two South African police officers were supposed to be guarding a prisoner that they’d escorted from the jail to a medical facility for a check up. While the prisoner was in one room getting a physical examination for some reason, the two officers decided to go into the waiting room and get physical. Like, really physical. Like, pants around ankles as if nobody’s going to come home (and as if there are no police cameras in every room of most police stations) physical.

The male correctional officer and a female police officer were caught on video having sex for well over 15 minutes, which beats my personal best by 14 and a half minutes. But not only were the two having sex while on duty, which is a big no-no because of the being police officers thing, but mostly because (tuh-WIST) the female officer was clearly wearing a wedding ring.

You can see the ring right on her left hand (of the law) — the same one she’s using to grab onto her male counterpart for balance, as she slides down her knickers with her other hand.

The Correctional Services Commissioner had said on several occasions that he would not tolerate any form of misconduct by the prison wardens anymore, though. So when one of them tried handing in a 24 hour resignation notice they were denied and, according to a spokesperson, even that wasn’t good enough… he said “we are hoping that we will have finalised our internal disciplinary processes within 30 days”.

So apparently, and unfortunately for the officers, there really was no way they were getting off easy on this one *jumps gracefully into a pool of “boo”s*


Detroit Police Officer Caught Having Sex With A Transvestite Prostitute In His Patrol Car

A Fox 2 reporter was told that the officer took the prostitute to a remote area, parked his squad car and the two engaged in sex acts inside the cruiser while the cop was on the clock. This is worse than Hugh Grant AND Eddie Murphy (who both had transvestite prostitute scandals) because at least theyweren’t on the job.

Two other police officers had stumbled upon the car, saw it a-rockin’ and then violated a bumper sticker rule as old as time itself and went a-knockin’. When they discovered that it was their co-worker and a prostitute they immediately went to their superiors. The Detroit Police Chief said, “I think it’s important to note that this is misconduct that we discovered,” he added. “We expect eight hours work for eight hours pay.”

The saddest part about this is that it doesn’t sound like cops get any kind of lunch break.


Police Officer Has Sex In His Police Car On City Property

Two cops were out doing their jobs, patrolling around like cops tend to do (in my mind), when they spotted a suspicious white SUV on city property, which since the OJ Simpsons trial puts cops on edge in general. More specifically in this instance, though, the white SUV in question was in the parking lot of District 1 headquarters. Who could possibly be in this secure area, making a ruckus? They flashed their brights behind the car like that one time you remember from high school that you miraculously didn’t get grounded for and realized who was in the car.

Their boss.

Apparently, after he and his girlfriend attended a Bengals game they thought it would be nice to perform a lewd act in public, on city grounds because why the hell not? He runs the place and nobody’s really getting hurt. Also maybe they had to sober up (on love).

The boss in question, Lt. Christopher Ruehmer (who you should high five if you ever meet him), was then transferred from his job as a deputy commander with the patrol administration and a SWAT crisis negotiator… to the police records department following the incident.

So you know in action movies when the boss says “we’ll have you at a desk job faster than you can say public spectacle!” and Mel Gibson ends up actually pulling off the rogue cop thing? Well that doesn’t always happen in real life.

Awesomely, though, the guy’s pay wasn’t cut at all. So hey, worth it?


Indonesia Police Officer Needs Police Protection After Being Caught Having Sex On Duty

An Indonesian Police Officer was caught having sex with a married woman while on duty in a very religious section of the country, which if it were in America, would really be the most interesting part of the whole story. This is usually where it ends in America. But this was Indonesia. And it was a very religious part of the country.

Like anyone would naturally assume is fair, then, the residents of the village then paraded him through the village as they banged cans together to alert others to the adulterous affair, humiliating him and shaming his name. And just when it seemed that the man would be beaten to death by the residents, his co-workers came to the rescue.

Officers were then also posted outside the home of the woman, Heni Herawati, to prevent it from being destroyed over the adultery committed on their street (evil spirits and all that).

The pair were taken to Mojokerto Police headquarters where the authorities did what any other authorities would do (at a high school), they told the police officer’s mother what he had done. The mother burst into tears and then apologized to the public on her son’s behalf.

I can’t even… I just… wow.


Memphis Police Officer Caught On Tape Having Sex

A Memphis Police Officer picked up a girl to have sex in his squad car like a boss, so what could possibly go wrong? Well, anyone who’s ever watched a cop show (a.k.a. all of you if you had the kind of grandparents I grew up with) knows that those cars are wired for sound and video, ready to capture any foul play or criminal activities of any kind. This officer completely forgot that fact.

While doing the deed he also had his microphone on, so every sound was transmitted over the police scanners, which means that for a few golden minutes, a police car actually made a sound that didn’t make everyone within ear shot want to kill themselves. Probably.