Exchanging cute Valentine’s Day cards featuring fictional characters and romantic phrases is a holiday tradition as old as candy hearts with silly phrases on them. What better way to let the object of your affection feel loved and appreciated than by giving him or her a message from their favorite superhero? Sometimes, though, a seemingly sweet pun from Spider-Man just sounds more like a reference to auto-erotic asphyxiation.
Other times, a nice superhero pun or innuendo is just wildly inappropriate for the youngsters who will actually receive these cards. Take a look at these superhero-themed Valentine’s Day cards that may have missed the mark when it comes to courting young love. Some of these cards might be available online, so if you feel like creeping out a loved one, make sure to stock up on misguided Valentine’s Day superhero cards! If not, just vote up the funniest comic book Valentine’s cards.
Sounds Like True Love
Great Pun, but Maybe Not for Kids?
Spider-Man: Master of the Erotic Pun
Moving the Planet Would Effectively Kill Us All. Thanks Wonder Woman!
Wait, So Do You Get All Three or Do You Have to Pick One?
That Sounds Like it Hurts, Robin
Maybe Retract the Claws?
Romance, Thy Name Be Mjolnir!
Bros Can Give Cards Too, Okay?
This Would Be Cute, Presuming Your Valentine is a Swinger
I Hear Locomotives Are Terrible Lovers
The Dark Knight and the Nefarious Friendzone
Oh My God This is Terrifying Please Unthaw that Woman
Well This Sounds Mildly Threatening
Hey, It’s a Horribly Disproportionate Drawing of Catwoman!
That’s Lust, Not Love, Animal Man
That’s Why I’m Chasing You: To Catch You!
It’s Your Patriotic Duty
He Will Find You, and He Will Smooch You
I Love You Like Joker Loves Having Limbs!
Remember: Joker Once KILLED Robin
I Don’t Know Which is Worse, “You’re In My Power” or “Sproing!”
Be Mine or Batman and Superman Will Beat You Up